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You must do the thing you think you cannot do.     Eleanor Roosevelt

Learning to accept what was unthinkable changes you.   Jackie Kennedy

We cannot afford to forget any experience, not even the most painful.

 Dag Hamarshjold

 

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Truth……

Death is more universal than life; everyone dies but not everyone lives.

A. Sachs

 

Some ideas and suggestions which can go into a Memory Box:

  1. Plaster and/or foot prints, if possible.  Sometimes the hospital staff will take them, the funeral home or a local individual who specializes in such work.  They can also be framed into a shadow box as a cherished momento.
  2. Photographs in a variety of poses:  singly, together, dressed, undressed, just hands and/or feet, with parents, siblings, grandparents.
  3. Ultrasound pictures, cards, notes receive.
  4. Photographs from the funeral.
  5. Hospital bracelet(s).
  6. Special ornament for the holidays.
  7. Honorary birth certificate if baby was born still.  Make sure the hospital correctly identifies the multiple-birth.  The loss of one triplet, does not make twins.
  8. Death Certificate.
  9. Some items such as ultrasounds and/or photos can be etched into crystal.  An internet search will provide information regarding such services.
 
Heartbreaking news out of Humboldt.  This is just heartbreaking. I cannot imagine the pain. 

I am very excited to read about this is this morning’s news feed. The Dionne Quintuplets are the only recorded MONOZYGOTIC (Identical) quintuplets in the world. Unfortunately the story takes a down turn from that point as three levels of government stepped in and took the babies from their parents and other siblings, placed them in an observation building and displayed them to the public for the first nine years of their lives. “Quintland,” as the compound was called, became a huge money maker for the area as more than five million tourists viewed them through a one-way mirror.
The 5 young ladies were returned to their parents aged 9 and virtually were strangers to not only their parents, but their 8 other siblings as well due to their long, imposed separation from their family. The reunion did not go well at all and in the
late 1980s, the Canadian government compensated the surviving Quints for their pain and suffering as a result of the rupture caused by their forced removal from their family home. This was not one of Canada’s finer moments.
Both myself (www.jumelle.ca) and Multiple Births Canada (www.multiplebirthscanada.org) have been working for several decades to ensure that multiples in Canada and beyond are not exploited, forceably or needlessly removed from their families or separated from each other for adoption. We must learn from the mistakes of the past and ensure that our errors in judgement are not carried forward.
My heart feels good this morning as this tragedy of circumstances of birth is somewhat rectified, acknowledged and the Dionne Family fully recognized for the very special and unique family they are.

Linda Leonard has created an amazing, comprehensive resource regarding multiple births in British Columbia, Canada 🇨🇦️ and beyond. This in depth brochure will be of interest to parents expecting twins or more, grandparents, healthcare professionals, researchers, grieving parents, and any one else with an interest in multiple births. Lots of information and resources re breastfeeding of multiples. I am so excited about this valuable brochure. Check it out here: https://nursing.ubc.ca/pdfs/twinstripletsandmore.pdf

Sometimes we can open our mouth and put in our foot, just as the saying goes.  In times of crisis, illness, loss, or bereavement, it can be very easy to say the wrong thing.  Here is some food for thought about avoiding saying the wrong thing.

http://www.latimes.com/nation/la-oe-0407-silk-ring-theory-20130407-story.html#share=email~story